“BUT, WHAT DID I DO ALL DAY?”
Do you ever get to the end of the day and think to yourself, “What the heck did I do today?” Do you feel like you were busy all freaking-day-long doing 1000 things, but nothing that actually mattered got done?
I think any human, and especially Moms, recognize that sentiment. But here’s the thing (and you’ve probably heard this before), everyone has the same amount of hours in a day that Beyoncé has. Think about that. We see others with successful careers, others satisfied in their motherhood, and we feel like they are “killing it.” But it’s NOT because they have more than 24 hours in their day.
So my question is, how can we learn from them?
You’ve heard me say this before - there is freedom in discipline. I really believe this! Now hear me out - if discipline is something that makes you feel bogged down or restricted, I totally understand because I used to feel the same way. But here’s the thing - when you are disciplined with your time, you get things done that actually matter, and then you can relax. What a concept! The more disciplined and organized I am, the more relaxed I feel, because things are not looming, waiting to be done, and taking up precious bandwidth in my brain.
Two things frequently come up in my community and in my Membership for Moms as sought-after goals. One is the ability to be more intentional with time, and the other is how to have permission to say no. So with that in mind, I’ve listed below five ways to help you reclaim your time, feel more in control, and have more space to breathe and be. I want you to be able to show up as a more present and radiant person, both for your children AND in your life.
(I recently watched a Marie TV episode all about time tracking. I highly recommend you check out the episode. Here is a link. A few tips below are from the episode!)
1. LOWER YOUR EXPECTATIONS OF WHAT CAN GET DONE
Tip number one is my favorite because I think it will help you breathe a sigh of relief and give you the grace that you so desperately have been craving. One secret to long-term productivity is to lower the expectations of what you think you can get done in a day. So often as moms we have about 20 things on our to-do list, and we just keep moving them from day to day, feeling like failures. But what if you just put 1 to 3 things on that list that you were actually able to accomplish? Wouldn’t you feel good? And here’s the thing - when you feel good, you might want to do more. Now your to-do list is a choice instead of an obligation. So drop the ball and stop trying to be superwoman. I want you to match your expectations with reality. I repeat, I want you to match your expectations with reality.
2. TIME TRACK
Number two is a tip I got from the Marie TV episode. Be curious about where your time goes. “If you want to spend your time better, you need to figure out where the time is going now.” Data is key. Where are you wasting time? Is it in the car or cleaning? How can you use that time more wisely? (Maybe listen to a podcast or catch up on a good audio book while you clean or drive.) If you want to make a change, track your time. Even tracking for just one week will give you so much insight. Make the time to do this. There are probably many lost hours per day that could be used for something you enjoy much more.
3. GET ON THE NO TRAIN
Tip number three is to say no more often. Marie likes to say, “Get a first class ticket on the no train.“ I know this can be hard for some people, and it is often easier to say yes. But look into the future. When your “yes” answer comes due, it can be a real drain. Clear your calendar of the things you don’t want to be doing or don’t want to devote the time to. For me, if it’s not a “hell yes,” then it’s a “no.” The beautiful thing about saying no is that once you get in the habit of saying it, you will discover that you have more space in your life (and in your heart) to say a genuine yes, a full-hearted yes, a committed yes.
4. UTILIZE MORNINGS
My next tip is to utilize your morning time before life gets in the way. Now I know not everyone is a morning person, but in general, most people do their best thinking in the morning. (Now, if you’re not getting enough sleep, that’s a whole other issue. Sleep deprivation might be the reason why you can’t wake up in the morning. Can you go to bed earlier?) For me, I can do things twice as fast in the morning than I can do in the afternoon. As the day goes on, there are often interruptions, chaos, or things that come up out of the blue. If I get the most important tasks done early, I have a sense of relaxation and calm for the rest of the day because what really matters is done.
5. CHECK YOUR PHONE HABITS
Last but not least, figure out if your phone or your social media are problems for you. For some, it really is downtime, but for me, picking it up 10 times while I’m watching Netflix is actually the opposite of relaxing. In general, people feel more relaxed about their time management if they are on the phone less. There are a million recommendations to help you limit your phone time. For me, the best thing I can do is just leave it in another room. If my phone is out of sight, I’m not tempted to pick it up. Constant scrolling and making comparisons can leave you feeling like total crap. Take the time you would normally spend on your phone and invest it in a good book, intentional playtime with your children, or exercising. We limit our kids’ screen time and are protective for their sakes, so why shouldn’t we do the same for ourselves?
OK, over to you Mama. Which of these five tips resonated with you the most and why?
The ✨ RADIANCE REVOLUTION ✨ is a monthly membership program where I give you the tools, inspiration, support, and community you need to be the kind of mother and human you are meant to be! You’ll learn ways you can achieve harmony in your home, health, relationships and money and you will be supported every step of your journey. The Radiance Revolution will help you wake up excited for your life
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